Sunday Thoughts

Happiness is an inside job, don't let anyone else take that much power over your life.
 Over the past year or so I have changed exponentially as a person. I spent so many years of my life trying to achieve things for other people's happiness; living, reacting and responding to other peoples choices. It wasn't until someone who was incredibly instrumental in a lot of the changes I've made told me that to care for yourself, to prioritise your own happiness and to most importantly love yourself how you wish to be loved by another is not selfish; it is essential for a mentally healthy and fulfilling life.

Recent weeks for me have been difficult. I had university exams (if you've read any of my other more personal blog posts, you can probably make a good guess about how well I coped with this stress), I faced rejection for something which knocked my confidence, and I was disappointed in myself for my fitness efforts, feeling like the progress I am making does not equate to how important the journey is for me. I'm trying to make changes to both my mental and physical strength; something I have feared for a long time. Sometimes it can be hard to admit that where we are is so far from where we want to be, and that thought can be so disheartening. These weeks have felt like a struggle, moving two steps forward, one step back. I have to remember that that is still one step forward. Still one step in the right direction.

I've learnt, and am still learning that you can't compare your beginning to someone else's middle. Where you start from is unique to you and progress no matter how small is progress. Failure is hard. But without it, we wouldn't appreciate success. The hardest part is not the rejection itself, it is getting up and moving forward. Even more recently I learnt that that in itself is strength. 

So when you feel so far from your goal and the end seems unreachable, remember only to look back to see how far you've come. I may not be where or who I want to be, but I am far from where and who I once was, and closer to getting there than I was yesterday.